It's old vs. new as two robots who were sent to destroy the city take each other on to see who is more worthy to destroy the city.
Spoiler: This fight features fictional characters who originated from online games. If you don't know these characters, it is highly recommended that you play the Collateral Damages games before reading this.
Hiro: AKO21 and STOOFA were sent to Earth with a single, simple mission: Destroy all life. But on their own, which robot is deadliest? I'm Hiro Hamada.
MBStarscream: I'm MBStarscream.
Hiro: And it's our job to examine both warriors' strength, abilities, weapons, and weaknesses to see who would win in a fight.
Hiro: Standing at an unknown height and likely weighing about 3.5-23.5 metric tons, AKO21 is just the robot for the job.
MBStarscream: AKO21 has a large gun for a left arm, and let me tell ya, it never runs out and it's bullets pack serious punches.
Hiro: The bullets of AKO21's gun are capable of destroying just about anything: police cars, tanks, helicopters, statues... this thing... and even buildings.
MBStarscream: Speaking of which, AKO21 is one tough son of a bitch. That rhymes!
Hiro: AKO21 can shrug off missiles, being blasted by tanks and helicopters, explosions, and also being blasted by whatever the heck that thing is.
MBStarscream: But AKO21 is not invincible. It will be destroyed if it takes too much damage.
Hiro: But AKO21 can protect itself by setting up a shield that lasts for a few seconds. Much like AKO21, the latter's shields can endure anything... but for some reason, setting up shields drains AKO21's energy.
MBStarscream: So what's the point of setting up shields at all if they're just gonna drain your energy?
Hiro: And finally, AKO21's jetpack allows it to temporarily fly and AKO21 itself can somehow bounce off of helicopters to get to the top of buildings.
MBStarscream: In conclusion, this is a machine that you do not want attacking your city. The same can be said for STOOFA, but we'll get to that guy in a second.
AKO21 is destroyed.
MBStarscream: See? Didn't take long at all!
Wolverine-Man: Actually, it did take long because it has been eight days since I FINALLY edited the AKO21 section. So it technically took eight days.
MBStarscream: Oh, shut up Wolvy! Get on with it!
Hiro: Anyway, STOOFA is the second robot that was sent to destroy the city, the first being his soon-will-be opponent. It either succeeded or was eventually destroyed by the military like AKO21.
MBStarscream: Either way, it's still taller than AKO21 and probably weighs more.
Hiro: STOOFA has two wrecking balls with spikes for hands which can extend and destroy anything unlucky enough to be in front of STOOFA.
MBStarscream: It's actually superior to AKO21's gun, since it destroys sections of buildings faster than AKO21's gun can!
Hiro: STOOFA can also protect itself with it's indestructible shield and can fire bullets from it's body, which are just as powerful as the bullets of AKO21's gun.
MBStarscream: STOOFA is also just as tough as AKO21, which means that nothing can destroy it, except for too much damage.
Hiro: Plus, it doesn't have a jetpack like AKO21 does and has a slower walking speed than the aforementioned robot.
MBStarscream: But that doesn't mean STOOFA isn't just as deadly as AKO21 and I have faith that he will win this.
Hiro: We'll just have to wait and see, MBStarscream.
STOOFA is destroyed.
Fatal Fiction Edit
Mario flips a coin.
Hiro: Well, it looks like this is taking place in the city. Both have the home advantage, but only one can end the other.
MBStarscream: And only one can destroy the city, so no matter who wins, we lose in the end.
The city (Let's just call it that)
The city was silent.
Black skies clung to the heavens. Skyscrapers stood without power. Vehicles clogged up the vacant streets. Smoldering neighborhoods burned unspoiled. The people that were alive evacuated the city, and with good reason.
Two robots were sighted in the city.
Their designs were too bizarre to be described, so let's just introduce them: AKO21 and STOOFA.
Both were sent to the city to cause as much damage and end as many lives as possible. Anything that stoof in their way were destroyed. Helicopters, tanks and... whatever that thing is... But there was only one more thing for either of them to destroy.
That was why the two machines of genocide were facing each other right now, ready for a epic duel between metallic killers. It was time to find out who was better at causing collateral damage.
STOOFA began walking toward AKO21 as the latter began firing it's gun. When it was close enough, STOOFA hit AKO21 with one of it's wrecking balls.
MBStarscream bursts into laughter
Anyway, AKO21 jumped back and continued firing. Except this time, STOOFA had it's shield up. AKO21 just kept firing at the shield. For a while, the bullets did nothing to the shield, until was destroyed in an explosion.
STOOFA jumped toward AKO21, but the latter set up a shield before jumping back. No matter times STOOFA hit the shield with it's wrecking ball-
MBStarscream holds back laughter
MBStarscream: I'm sorry, but when you type that, I just can't keep a straight face.
Well, try to keep a straight face. And if you laugh one more time during this battle, I am never using you as a host again.
MBStarscream: OK, don't have to be harsh.
Anyway, STOOFA just couldn't destroy the shield. AKO21 jumped over STOOFA, turned around and began firing it's gun again. STOOFA turned around and tried to hit AKO21 with it's wrecking ball, but AKO21 jumped into the air and resumed firing.
If STOOFA could feel emotions, it would be feeling frustration right now. Not only did the little bastard destroy it's shield, but it was too fast to hit. Now it was going to use another weapon.
Time seemed to slow down as both AKO21 and STOOFA jumped into the air and fired their guns. The bullets bounced off of each other until the two robots landed on the ground. The gun stopped firing and STOOFA successfully hit AKO21 with it's wrecking ball.
AKO21 would have started to fear STOOFA's wrecking balls if it could. They left some dents in it (AKO21), and just a few more hits would surely destroy it. It needed to finish STOOFA quickly.
AKO21 resumed firing at STOOFA. STOOFA tried to hit it (No that way) with it's wrecking ball, but AKO21 jumped back, flew in the air temporally with it's jetpack, landed on it's feet and continued firing. STOOFA ignored the bullets as it walked toward AKO21. It then hit AKO21 with it's wrecking ball, successfully destroying it.
...Or at least, it would have. By dumb luck, AKO21 had inflicted too much damage for STOOFA to continue fighting, so the robot blew up in an awe-inspiring explosion. AKO21 then walked away. It had proved that it was the only one worthy enough to destroy the city.
MBStarscream: At least we saw something awesome before we were doomed.
Hiro: Even though STOOFA was physically bigger and it's wrecking balls-
MBStarscream bursts into laughter again
Hiro: -were very dangerous and could have actually gave it the victory, AKO21 had the advantage in nearly everything else.
MBStarscream: When you have a jetpack and you're fighting someone twice your size and weight, you know you can outmaneuver them.
Hiro: Nothing is capable of destroying AKO21 and STOOFA's shields, but AKO21's shields are tougher and AKO21's gun could destroy STOOFA's shield and while both robots will be destroyed if they take too much damage, only one can truly destroy the other.
MBStarscream: And who is that robot you might ask? Why, it's AKO21, of course!
Hiro: AKO21's shields can protect it from STOOFA's wrecking balls anyway.
MBStarscream holds back laughter
Hiro: The bullets of STOOFA's torso gun are powerful, but AKO21's gun functions better. I mean, STOOFA's gun only works when the latter in the air, for crying out loud! On the other hand, AKO21 can fire his gun anywhere!
MBStarscream: And finally, AKO21's range is superior to STOOFA's thanks to it's trusty gun compared to STOOFA's not-as-trusty-but-still-powerful wrecking balls. AKO21 just AK.O'ed his opponent! STOOFA just had the stoofing beaten out of it!
The music stops at how bad those puns were
MBStarscream: OK, I'll admit, those puns were awful, but they were the only ones I could think of.
Hiro: (unenthusiastically) AKO21 wins.
AKO21 (Winner) Edit
- Has a jetpack
- Gun could destroy STOOFA's shield and eventually STOOFA itself
- Shields could protect it from STOOFA's wrecking balls (HAHAHAHA!)
- Gun works better than STOOFA's torso gun, which only fires when STOOFA is in the air
- Has better range thanks to gun compared to STOOFA's wrecking balls (Pfft...)
- Shields are more durable than STOOFA's own shield